I don’t trust money

Ordinarily when we think about trust issues, we think about trusting another person. We wonder if we can rely on them, if they’ll truly be there for us and if they’re really who they appear to be. We can also question if they will honour the friendship or relationship by being loyal, by accepting us fully and being non judgemental. We want to know that it’s safe to be ourselves and that ultimately they will keep our secrets safe and protect our heart and feelings. 

For some of us it goes a step further, we may wonder if we can actually trust ourselves. We will question our own inner wisdom and intuition, those gut feelings and hunches that we so often have. Our minds will try and get us to be logical, realistic, or trick us into going for the safe option, rather than what is right for us. It will make us remember all the times we made a decision and got it wrong. Can you feel yourself being emotionally triggered by this at all? Maybe old memories are starting to arise, or you’re beginning to feel some discomfort in your body. Keep reading and keep noticing all of this, more clues are being revealed which will help you to better understand yourself.

Trust issues don’t stop here. Due to our past pain and disappointment we are filled with fear about experiencing these emotions again, whatever the trigger. Our lack of trust has become part of who we are and it doesn’t end with our inability to trust others and ourselves – it can also affect our relationship with money.

Yes, you read that right and you might already be aware of this after answering the earlier questions. Let’s go a little deeper when it comes to the connection between trust and money.

So often we can fear that money will let us down, abandon us, or won’t be there for us when we really need it. Just think about those times when the bills need paying, you need to do the weekly shop, get the car mended, or buy new shoes for the kids. This belief and fear can also stretch into the things you would love to buy or provide for your family, for example buying your own home, presents at Christmas and birthdays and being able to take your family away on holiday. Every time these situations arise and money isn’t there for us, we lose our trust and faith. The same way you would with a person who continually let you down.

For some people they don’t trust and believe that earning money can be easy. When money comes in too quickly, easily or in large amounts, they just don’t allow themselves to trust…they are suspicious and they have already gone to a place of fear in their minds. For example, they could be saying or thinking things such as – it’s not real, it won’t last, it can’t be this easy, there will be a price to pay or a sacrifice to make, or someone will take it away.

Can you begin to see just how important it is to be clear on what trust means to you and where you are holding onto past pain, hurt and disappointment? At some point you would have made a decision that it wasn’t safe to trust and this is now impacting key areas of your life, as well as your relationship with money.

It’s time to get clear on how you feel about money right now, because this is the first step in changing your relationship with it and ultimately how much of it you will allow yourself to have: 

  1. Close your eyes and take some nice deep cleansing breaths – in through the nose and out through the mouth. Just feel your body relaxing.
  2. Let go of the thoughts of the day and give yourself permission to be fully present and set the intention of being open to clarity.
  3. Know that you’re deeply grounded, imagine roots coming from the soles of your feet and connecting you to the earth if it helps. This is especially useful if you have a busy mind.
  4. Know that you’re safe, imagine a bubble of energy all around you keeping you safe and supporting you as you go through this process.
  5. If it helps, place a hand over your heart space and repeat the words ‘I don’t trust money’ over and over again.
  6. Notice what you see in your minds eye, what memories or people appear. Notice any feelings and emotions too, as these can also hold clues.
  7. Once you have seen and felt enough, take a deep breathe, come back to the present moment and capture these insights in your journal or notebook.

We all have stories and fears around money and it will be very individual for each of us. There are no right or wrong answers with this. It simply is what it is. The most important thing is to get more clarity on your own blocks, so that you can open your heart again to trusting money and having money in your life. 

It’s the same thing you would be told about love, if you close your heart to love and to trusting people, how will you ever experience the joy of true connection, intimacy and passion.

Now that you’re clear on how you feel and where it stems from, we need to heal and release this and rebuild your confidence in being willing to trust. Here are some options for you. Take what resonates and leave the rest: 

  1. Journal on how you feel. Safe awareness is key and sometimes this is all that is needed to break the pattern. Other times the self-awareness let’s you know what healing needs to be done.
  2. EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) – use this video to work through your inability to trust money. Notice what emotions and memories come up for you. Yawning, laughing and crying is all very normal, some people even feel the energy shift in their body.
  3. You can also try an additional EFT video about trusting others, yourself and something bigger than you. This can give additional insights and provide a deeper level of healing.
  4. Forgive, forgive and then forgive a bit more. I guarantee you will feel much lighter without the heaviness of anger, resentment, betrayal, envy and self-guilt etc. We will be looking at forgiveness in a later module, so keep a note of everything and everyone that needs some forgiveness and we’ll come onto that a little later.

When you can begin to trust money again, you will feel such a weight lift. I know it’s not easy and I wouldn’t dream of pretending it was. Even now I can have my moments, but at last I do know that it’s safe to trust money and I know it will be there when I need it. When you too can do that, money will come back into your life, consistently and reliably.

I just don’t trust the universe – Tap With Marie from Marie Houlden on Vimeo.