Tips on how to forgive
Forgiveness can take time so don’t expect to work on this once and for everything to be healed. The process and time needed will be different for everyone.
Here are some things that will support you in this process:
1) Allow yourself the time and space to feel into your emotions. Don’t stay with the anger, as this is only a mask, go to the hurt and see what is coming up for you. If it makes it easier, write it down or perhaps talk it through with a trusted friend or professional.
2) If you’re ready, look for the learning and what this has taught you. For example, feeling like people walk all over you and treat you like a doormat could mean that after doing the forgiveness work, you recognise that you need to speak your truth, enforce your personal boundaries and be kinder and more accepting of yourself
3) Use the meditations in this course to help you identify what needs to be forgiven and to begin the process of releasing. It’s essential to do this more than once, because for most people, a lifetime of living, means a lifetime of stored up emotions.
4) The Ho’Oponoono Meditation is an ancient Hawaiian practice of forgiveness. There are key words that need to be repeated throughout the meditation and at first it can seem hard to focus on these words towards someone who has betrayed or hurt us, but the release can be very powerful. Try it and see. There are plenty to choose from on You Tube, just find one that resonates for you.
5) Separate the person from the behaviour, especially if this is someone very close to you, i.e. a child or partner. The behaviour may have been bad, but the person as a whole is not. Often their actions speak more about what is going on for them, than about you. It’s a normal response to experience the hurt and take it personally, but usually there are things going on for the other person, which we’re unaware of. This could be a great opportunity to reconnect, communicate and create a better relationship. There is always a choice about how we want to respond and deal with things.
6) When it comes to self-forgiveness, accept that in the moment, you made the best decision you could. Looking back maybe you could have chosen differently, but that decision has brought you to exactly this point and made you who you are today. It’s part of what makes you who you are and I believe its part of your souls journey. Choose the learning and then know that you have the power to choose differently next time.
7) As always use EFT/Tapping to clear the blocks. These are wonderful at getting to the deeper reasons that we struggle to forgive and then to actually help the whole healing process. Perfect opportunity to reach out to me and have a private session!
8) If you struggle with talking about your emotions, but know that forgiveness work is needed, then explore energy healing instead. Things such as Reiki for example are a wonderful way to relax, be brought back into a state of balance and to release those old and heavy emotions.
9) Choose compassion, because when you can be kinder to yourself and more understanding of others, forgiveness becomes much easier.
10) Release any shame. This will make you feel so much lighter, because the weight you have been carrying around has been lifted.
Of the 10 examples I’ve shared above, what are you prepared to commit to?