Well done on committing to yourself and doing these exercises. They are the foundation to everything we will cover and clear. You have to know where you’re starting from, if you’re to move forward.
“As long as you look for someone else to validate who you are by seeking their approval, you are setting yourself up for disaster. You have to be whole and complete in yourself. No one can give you that. You have to know who you are, what others say is irrelevant.” Nic Sheff
Here are some simple tips for boosting your self esteem and self acceptance:
- Accept how you feel about things, don’t get annoyed with yourself or think you’re a bad person. Accept those feelings of anger, disappointment or failure – in the moment, that is how you feel so don’t reject it. Let me share something here to help. I am a highly sensitive personand I need to constantly manage my energy. Certain people and situations can be very draining for me and so sometimes I have to make choices that others just don’t understand and can even make me seem boring or anti social. I used to judge myself all the time for this or force myself to do things, but once I fully accepted who I was and what I needed, everything changed. I could finally own my uniqueness and my needs. I also experienced less resentment because I was being honest and not saying yes to things, when actually I wanted to say no.
- Express gratitude for the fact that every decision you have made has brought you to this point and made you who you are. Without those decisions perhaps you wouldn’t have your partner, your family, your pets, your friends, your job etc etc.
- Recognise that you may need to forgive yourself and release the old emotions – there is no need to carry shame, guilt or regret anymore. Judging yourself for not accepting who you really are is huge… when I went through this process I was pretty mad at myself for a while. I couldn’t believe I had thought so little of myself and made other peoples emotions and happiness more important than my own.
- Look for the positive things that you do and praise yourself for them. Maybe you’re amazing at remembering facts, or maybe you are a great listener – recognise what you do well. The more attention you give to spotting these things, the better you will feel about yourself.