Do you need to boost your self esteem?

“Self respect, self worth and self love, all start with self. Stop looking outside of yourself for your value” Rob Liano

Now that you’ve looked at your limiting beliefs, let’s go a little deeper with your self esteem!

There’s no doubt that we’re our own worst critics. If a friend spoke to us the way our inner voice does, they wouldn’t be our friend for long! We are cruel, unkind and relentless.

Limiting beliefs and self esteem are very closely connected. When these negative thoughts are focused on who you believe you are, and what you are capable of, it can seriously affect our self-esteem and how much we’re prepared to accept ourselves.

We are willing to have compassion, understanding and sympathy for others and their short-fallings, but we are not prepared to extend this same understanding to ourselves. We have made up our minds that what we are doing and who we are, is not acceptable and is not enough, this then affects our levels of self esteem.

The sad thing is that underneath the belief of ‘not being acceptable or enough’is a deep desire to know that we are okay, that we are lovable and worthy of love. Many of my clients seek this deep need for reassurance from others and yet they are not able to give this gift of acceptance to themselves.

They’re looking for someone, or something outside of themselves for validation of their self-worth and value.

Don’t wait for someone else to give you permission to accept yourself – or you could be waiting forever!

Let’s look at some signs that you may not be accepting yourself and that your self esteem could do with a boost:

• Your inner voice is very critical of everything you do and who you are
• You’re constantly comparing yourself to others and coming up short, even when you may not agree with their choices
• You constantly say sorry to others, even when there is nothing to say sorry for
• You can be overly defensive – this is actually a protection mechanism, because you fear being attacked. For example, someone criticising or judging you or something you have done
• You are very critical of others. Attacking others is always easier than self reflection and accepting decisions and choices you have made
• Physically you may feel frustration, tension or anxiety. You can also feel exhausted, because you can be prone to over achievement and perfectionism
• You experience strong emotions such as hate, anger and resentment. Sometimes we direct this towards others and go into victim/blame mode, when the truth is we are not accepting who we are

The moment I decided to accept who I was, warts and all,was the moment my life changed. I accepted that I was always going to be on a journey of discovery and growth, and that this was okay, as long as I could accept the fundamental parts of who I was. 

How do you feel about yourself and life right now?

This might seem like a strange question to ask, but so much of how we feel about ourselves is tied up in how much money we allow into our lives. If you don’t think you’re enough, or worthy, then why should other people pay you more money, or give you their cash at all? Often the emotions that we have in one areas of our life, are carried over into another, you just have to spot the patterns. Through this course, we’ll do this together.